Baby Tyt

Az has been begging for a "Baby Tytan" for months. We've been having a hard time finding one for less than $200, but we did a few weeks ago! We finally caved in and ordered her one! It was delivered last night & this little lady has been on cloud 9! She is obsessed with her "Baby Tyt"! It actually resembles him in quite a few ways! It brings tears to my eyes watching her talk & play with him. I really wish I could give her the real Baby Tytan!

Part of the Process

We are still staying with my parents, and well we are beginning to run out of room. Each kiddo had their own room and closet, but Az has so much stuff and toys that we needed to more space. As hard and devastating as it was, we got brave enough to go through Tytan's clothes and put SOME of them away. I have a major addiction with buying my kids clothes. I love it and I buy, buy, buy! I kept out most of what he wore hanging, but I decided to put away all the new clothes with tags away for something in the future whether that means for another baby or for baby gifts. It was hard, really hard, and there were a lot of tears and happy memories. Az loved it and I even let her pick out some to put on her babies.

Death is Nothing at All to these Two...as you can see!

Missing Baby Brother

I don't think I'm the only one missing our boy today...She's cried for an hour to go see him & I was packing up the room and find Az on the floor with Tyt's Halloween Jammies on. This is going to be rough:(

Best Friends

The thoughts of this little girl without her brother absolutely kills me! She is so good to him and they are seriously the best of friends. We are trying to give her every chance and opportunity we have left for her to play with her sweet baby brother. She is loving cuddling, singing, and taking care of Baby Tyt!

Storytime!!

Things are starting to look up.... I really hate saying it out loud because it seems like just when we are doing good they turn real quick. But he is doing relatively well. He is still on high flow but they are weaning. He is tolerating it well. He is still on Milranon to help his heart squeeze and take some of the work load.
We moved to a new room. We love this room because there is sunshine. It is amazing what a little sunshine can do for your spirit. I didn't realize it until now. I don't see much sunlight because I am in the hospital all day every day!
We had such a good day and for the first time in over a month I was able to snuggle both my babes together. It felt so good to do something "normal" even though we are in the hospital. We were able to snuggle up in the rocking chair and read books. Az loves reading to her baby brother.
It's the simple things like this we often take for granted. DON'T. I plead with you don't. We are not in charge of our future, and we are not certain what tomorrow holds. Cherish every moment you can with your children. Everything else can wait. You won't regret it.... I promise!

A Day Out with Big Sis

Az has really had to take a place on the back burner since everything happened with Tytan, so today we thought we would take her to do something fun! Tytan is in an okay spot, so the doctors & nurses begged me to get out and do something normal with her. My mom stayed back to be with him and we took Az to the circus. Azleigh had a ball and it was nice to get out, but it just doesn't feel right when we go out. Our little man is missing and it feels so weird without him. It was a long few hours and I was on needles & pins just crossing my fingers nothing went wrong.

Tytan's Biggest Fan

I must say Tytan couldn't have asked for a better big sister! The Lord knew he was going to need the very best and that is what he got. Azleigh has been amazing through this all. She is an absolute angel and way above her age. She has been so mature and understanding. I know that is weird to say about a 20 month old but really she just gets it! We have been very fortunate that my mom has stayed up here with her just down the road. She has came to visit every single day, and as the doctors say "Keep bringing her. She is her brother's best medicine" She is so cute with him and treats him as nothing is wrong. This is life as she knows it, and to her it's normal for her brother to be hooked to a million machines. She kisses and sings to him just like she did at home.
Tytan loves her just as much as she loves him. He is very responsive to her and opens his eyes every time she comes to visit now. She loves to read him books and give him kisses. She also loves to take the pink stethoscope and "check his heart" as she would say.
Az is the little sunshine of the ICU. The doctors and nurses wait for her every day! They love to hear what she has to say and what jewels she is wearing. I am so very grateful for her, and the light she brings in such a dark time!