Tytan

Oh how do I put the last six months in words, Tytan? You came into my life a storm of unknown worry and newness and fear and grief and Love. How did I know you would change my life in such an exquisitely beautifully painfully revolutionary way? No one understands completely what today means to me, not even you. I stand in the face of this day, that represents 168 days I have fought by your side, witnessed the most extreme of emotions pass through my body, breaking and healing it, again and again. I witness the miracle of YOUR body but most importantly your indomitable, joyful spirit.

You have awakened in me a strength I never knew existed in anyone. I have a power now that no one can take from me, a Love that has been tested and torn and tried and perseveres, tattered and frayed and beautiful and strong and perfect, like you. Like me. Beyond all that I have given you as your mother, most treasured of all, is Love. You are surrounded night and day by Love, and Joy and Sunshine and Laughter. You are magical and every heart opens in your presence. Your Heart is Happy, despite any circumstance, and it is generous with its sunshine.

I hope I can bask in your light for years to come. Moments with you burn into my brain - magic that I want to live in, frozen, forever. Your soul is precious and gorgeous and perfect and sometimes it seems as if you might be too good to keep here long, but I hope. Oh how I hope!! Your brand of sunshine is needed badly in this world and this Mama needs you here to Love. But what you have given me is far more than I can ever give to you. Your legacy is brilliant and it shines in everyone you spend time with. How amazing is that to say about a 5 1/2 month old? You are forgiving, and sweet, funny, and the most precious boy I've ever laid eyes on. It is an honor to walk this road with you as hard as it is, my beautiful little boy!

I gave you Life. And what a life it is. But even greater than that, is what you have given me. Thank you for teaching me about Love.